I am absent-minded. If you noticed. Can you imagine stuckkkkked at this moment? Where you have hell more to study and your mind is clinged to something. A decision to be made. I am insane. Sometimes i wonder what's in my mind that can disturb me for so long. I had no firm stand, easy to be influenced, etc etc. And i hate making decisions. Especially when both sides had their pros. Whether you are in or not, you lose and you gain. And you tried to talk and seek advice from each people. People look into your eyes, tell you sincerely that they can't help, this is your decision. To go or not to go, you will learn something and it's not like what you expect. You may be expecting too much and getting hell back. But as Jie Shi said, you can even learn from shitty experience. I have planned so many things for time to come but at this time, each and every decision will make a very big impact on my life onwards. Am i strong enough to hold on and bring it on? Rather than seeking objective advices, i need a subjective person instead. To tell me you do not have to choose, just go on to THIS particular path. And everything will be alright. DAMN. But in the end is respecting your choice, putting hope on you and expect you to decide on your own. I will seriously go into nuts like this.

Yin Zhien you need a clear mind. At this time. Please.